A Willing Spirit
At the beginning of this year I set the intention that I wanted to EXPAND myself consciously through my painting process and to be SEEN on this journey. Despite feeling deep resistance to this, often, my soul seems to find ways to guide me outside of my comfortable little studio bubble to make this happen... even when I'd rather stay hidden. This is how I found myself signing up for the RAWartist showcase in Sydney, which happened last Friday. Before I had a chance to over-think (as I often do) I had signed up and booked the show. The whole time leading up to the showcase I felt the pull of resistance and more than a handful of times I wondered how I could just pull out of it. But I was committed to it. I knew I needed to get there, to push through... to be willing to go forward. As it turns out, I'm so grateful I didn't let the voice of doubt take over and that I showed up. It was such a great experience and as often seems to happen, I walked away with a sense of purpose and clarity around my art... and some beautiful new connections that were genuine and authentic.
I'm learning that it's all about having a willing spirit. The willingness to say YES, despite the internal "NO" that comes from fear, doubt, uncertainty and vulnerability. The willingness to give more power to the light than the dark, and to see uncertainty in a more positive light - to see it as mystery filled with possibility and hope.
As I begin to shift my gaze and to see things from a new perspective, I also realise the selfishness (*ahm, yes) of giving in to my insecurities and staying hidden. Who does that serve? Not me, and likely no-one else either. Thinking of the many beautiful conversations that I shared remind me that my work is not done when I'm finished painting in my studio. A painting is not complete when it's hiding away. I forget this sometimes as my process is so deeply personal and spiritual... an unravelling, unveiling, unfurling of inner stories and consciousness. I forget that by making my work visible, by putting it out there, it is an invitation for others to see parts of themselves reflected back to them too. An invitation for an exchange, whether internal or otherwise. I know this might not always be the case... but sometimes it is. This alone makes it worth making the choice to be willing to show up. What happens after that isn't up to me... it is just up to me to have faith in my souls work. That's it.
What is it that you feel resistance to? What is your soul nudging you to show up for? How can you nurture your own willing spirit? It's a tricky, confronting and challenging path sometimes... but always worth it in the end.
Sending you love & light,